So, about two months ago, I rented a guitar, sort of out of the blue (ok, it was after I saw Sam Roberts play live recently), and started to learn to play. The guitar I happened to rent was a Taylor 114ce which is an acoustic guitar in Taylor’s Grand Auditorium shape (it has a slimmer waist) with a cutaway (“c”) and electronics (“e”). I played it for about a month and decided to buy one — but the 312ce model, which is their Grand Concert shape (slimmer waist and smaller “bout”) to fit my small arms a bit better. It’s still got the cutaway and the electronics (in case it ever needs to be amplified), and it’s all built out of solid wood. But my guitar is on backorder right now as Taylor is still making it. In the meantime, I’m borrowing a friend’s big dreadnought-shaped guitar and still playing away happily. It’s the perfect feeling to be able to play in the evenings after work and let my brain sort of melt.

It’s so interesting to me to observe in myself what I’m like at the beginning of a love affair with a new hobby. How rabid I can be in searching for information. How obsessed I can become with understanding the difference between different kinds of strings, tone woods, and even picks. How I can easily lose an hour playing the same four bars over and over again. I even feel motivated to somehow blog or record my thoughts about it.

Funny, how I can’t find time to collect my thoughts for this blog, but I can easily spend that time playing the guitar. I think that’s all because I get so caught up in “presenting” on this blog rather than simply documenting and expressing. Relaying and remembering. It’s all very ironic, since I’ve been asked to participate on a discussion panel at Northern Voice this coming Saturday, May 8th, specifically about how blogging and this whole social media/Ravelry world have changed how I craft. I think a lot of us knit-type bloggers have gone through a phase where we feel like we are only knitting so that we have things to show on our blogs. Where, we feel insecure or inadequate if we don’t constantly have finished objects to show. And then when you create these obstacles for yourself, you mute your own voice. You stop being able to share your thoughts about this thing that you love.

Come have a listen this weekend. Northern Voice is a local conference about personal blogging and social media and I’m intrigued by some of the other sessions like “Overcoming Social Anxiety” and “How to screw up your own personal blog” (hmm, this may be insight into my own psychosis). In our session, Fibre Arts Online it’ll be Kim Werker (of the all new MightyUgly.com — very very cool concept), Mandy Moore (of Yarnbombing and Knitty fame), and me… talking about how blogging about what we love changed our lives… for better or for worse.

A couple months ago, I found myself quite challenged and provoked by a documentary about the intersection between creativity and responsibility. It is truly liberating and enlightening to have someone describe and defend creative work in any genre. And so, I’m really looking forward to attending the Vancouver premier screening of Handmade Nation this Thursday, July 9th.

I’m hoping it will be a documentary that accurately describes and defends the rising movement of D.I.Y., art, craft, and design. I’m hoping to see women on-screen who do what I do, work how I work, experience both the struggles and the joy that I experience… so that hopefully, I don’t feel like I’m doing this all alone. It’s high expectations for a little film, but I have faith that it won’t disappoint. The director, Faythe Levine, will be present at only this one, Vancouver, screening for a Q&A and book signing session. Hope you’ll come see the film too… because I’d love to hear your feedback on it.

Thursday, July 9th, 2009
Location: Rio Theatre, 1660 East Broadway @ Commercial Drive
Screening at 8:00pm, Craft Showcase at 7:00pm

Traveling across the world to sold out crowds, it is Vancouver’s turn to join the handmade revolution! Join Director Faythe Levine, July 9th, for Western Canada’s premier of Handmade Nation. Be the first in Vancouver to see the film, meet Faythe Levine and participate in a Q&A and book signing session after the screening.

A companion book, Handmade Nation – The Rise of D.I.Y., Art, Craft, and Design, features 24 artists, their work environment, their process, their work, and discussions of how they got their start and what motivates them.

For more information, visit:
Handmade Nation’s official website
Faythe Levine’s blog

The five female artists in the film struggle to maintain a balance between their art, work and their families. Three of the five women end up divorced. It’s tremendously painful for me to hear the stories of all these women and how many of them are considered to be so selfish. How creativity is stuffed between driving kids from school to soccer practice. It’s reality, I suppose, that you can never do the one thing you want to do to satisfaction… everything is tempered with everything else. I guess that’s what we call “life/work balance”. But what about considering the option of creating until burnout and then renewing yourself? With each time that you creatively push yourself to and over the edge, you expand your experience and your ability to see new and different things. Maybe this is ultimately unhealthy and unbalanced but still a way to be creative.

I remember a time when for months, I would work to exhaustion. I’d create things until 4 am when my contacts dried onto my eyes. And then all productivity would drop off to zero and I’d sleep or stare blankly at the screen. And then I’d repeat the highs and lows. Maybe this is considered manic and unhealthy… but it was also a time when I was unnaturally prolific in the quantity and quality of the work I was creating.

When I took my hiatus from dyeing and designing, I basically fell off the face of the planet… not just as a creative person, but as a person, period. I felt that by the end of my timeout, my sadness and angst was most related to not having and serving purposeful, selfless work. I feel that I am nothing without real work… maybe because without real work, I have no reason to be here. I guess I don’t mean work as in what you do to buy groceries or pay rent… I mean work that you set your hands to, work that has hope for something outside of yourself. And I whether I am right or wrong to do so, I deeply relate this kind of work to personal identity.

If I am not my work, then who am I? If I am not sweetgeorgia, not a dyer, not a knitter, not a designer, not a business person, not an artist… then who am I? I tell you, cocktail party conversations are the worst. Validate your existence in seven words, now. Go!

I like long walks on the beach, music, and I can eat a baked good in the amount of time it takes you to say “baked good”. There’s got to be more than that.

On Saturday, I happened to stumble upon the show at the Richmond Art Gallery called Observation of Wonder, a two-part installation by artist, Brenda Maag. From her statement, she says “Doilies are made by crocheting and, like much domestic textile work, crochet was considered an acceptable form of creativity for women in the 19th and 20th centuries. No longer in style, doilies have been abandoned in thrift shops which is where I bought them for next to nothing. Observation of Wonder is a two-part installation made with a collection of these recovered handmade doilies … The installation represents a new appreciation of the beauty, symmetry and mathematical complexity of the doilies and invites viewers to see nature’s phenomenal diversity reflected in human creativity.”

If you get a chance to take a look, drop by the Richmond Art Gallery before the show closes on May 17th. The conservatory with the doilies is interesting to walk into and the beauty of these humble homely textiles is made accessible. What if your “acceptable form of creativity” had no value in society a hundred years from now? Would you still do it?

I struggle every single day with the idea of meaningful vs. financially satisifying work. This idea of the sexy job vs. the ugly job. Maybe I see this in every instance… the want to vs. the have to. I don’t know… I can’t be the only one that has these thoughts. Or has everyone already found meaningful, soul expanding, life work and I’m still knocking at the door?

Thanks for everyone’s encouragement on my little cardigan sweater! I’ve been knitting it again, this time in sportweight and trying to alter the shaping a little bit. I think I’ll work a bit on this sexy job this morning before I head off to my ugly job.

Year by year, we grow. We grow into ourselves. Hopefully with each year we grow more and more into authentic versions of ourselves. For me, this year has been an incredible opportunity to express the most authentic version of myself. To craft whenever and however I like, not necessarily being tied to the popularity or push of knitting, but unconciously choosing an older, slower form of craft in weaving. To choose this textile, craft and art as a means and way of living. Maybe the concept of “authentic version” of yourself is quite selfish… maybe it translates into being able to do whatever you want, whenever you want, with whomever you want… including sometimes choosing snowboarding over working at the dispensary. But I think the concept has more to do with being honest with yourself and creating balance… being true to yourself. And every day, I meditate on how intensely blessed I am to be able to do this work that I love.

Over the past four years, I have noted my top five thoughts, ideas, favourites, whatevers… and this year, I am thinking about all the things that I am grateful for. Every day has truly been a gift and every trial has been an opportunity for me to grow. For these opportunities I am grateful.

1. I am grateful for all the wonderful, eventful, and memorable times with friends this year including everything from snowboarding at Whistler and Cypress to river rafting in Clearwater, the Pemberton Music Festival and Whistler weekends in the summer and more. Everything from the big events to the small, quiet evenings with friends.
2. I am grateful for the health and safety of my family and friends. Into the new year, I pray that each and every one of them will find peace, happiness, joy and bliss.
3. I am grateful that I have a place to live and means of transportation (even though it failed me at the side of the highway in Kamloops in the summer and is now buried under snow). After hearing about the local woman who accidentally set fire to herself trying to stay warm, I have no excuse to whine about my place being chilly. None at all.
4. I am grateful for the opportunity to try to make an honest, hardworking effort at bringing SweetGeorgia Yarns into existence, both online and in-person. This is completely new for me and I know I am making mistakes left, right and centre… missing things and missing out on things… but I will continue to do my best to make this opportunity work.
5. I am grateful for the continued support of friends, family, readers, knitters, weavers, customers, and fellow crafters. Sometimes, I am frustrated with myself for not being able to move forward faster and stronger, but this is the best that I can do with the energy and the resources that I have now.

That’s already five, but I’d also like to add that I’m grateful and excited that Kim Werker nudged and convinced me to go to TNNA in San Diego in January… I’ve never been to either. Actually, I’ll be flying to Los Angeles a few days early and driving to San Diego, possibly stopping for some surfing or yarn stores along the way. We’ll see. Having never left Vancouver for an actual yarn industry type activity, I know no one… but I’m hoping to meet a few of my heros including Cat Bordhi, Maggie Casey, and Stephanie Japel…

I am also looking forward to starting to offer spinning and weaving classes during late January and February. There are currently a ton of hand spindles in the studio, and three new spinning wheels are on the UPS truck to me. The shipment should include a Schacht Ladybug wheel, Louet Victoria, and Louet Julia spinning wheels plus a bunch of small looms. I am nervous and yet so very excited about 2009.

In grand holiday tradition, our Top 5 has become a yearly blog contest… Tell me what you are grateful for this year and maybe what you are looking forward to in 2009. Of course, I will be sending one randomly selected responder some lovely hand-dyed yarn. Please post your thoughts via the comments box below by Monday, December 31 at midnight PST.

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to you and yours,
sweetgeorgia (aka Felicia)

For the past two years, I’ve made this list of Top 5 for the year — here are [2005](http://blog.sweetgeorgiayarns.com/2005/12/top-5-for-2005/) and [2004](http://blog.sweetgeorgiayarns.com/2004/12/top-5-for-2004/). This year, I want to do something different. I have four questions here…

1. How was 2006 for you?
2. What was the highlight of your year?
3. What did you want to accomplish that you didn’t get to?
4. What are you planning for 2007?

I would love to hear *your* responses. They don’t have to be about knitting or spinning or weaving… we’re talking about you and all that comes with it — yarn or otherwise! __Post me your answers in the comments by Friday, December 1 at midnight PST and I’ll randomly draw someone to receive yarn (2 skeins of Superwash Sock) or fibre (a 100g braid of BFL)…__ your pick.

Over the past year, so many overwhelmingly challenging yet positive things happened to me that I couldn’t just reflect on my fibre-y activities. So here are my responses:

####How was 2006 for you?
Productive. Passionate. Undeniably life-changing.

####What was the highlight of your year?
Meeting [Patrick Green and Paula Simmons](http://blog.sweetgeorgiayarns.com/2006/02/where-carders-come-from/)? Yeah, that was awesome. Weaving on [my own, beautiful floor loom](http://blog.sweetgeorgiayarns.com/2006/07/upstairs-downstairs/)? Yeah, also amazing. Having my handdyed yarns available at the newest local yarn shop, [three bags full](http://blog.sweetgeorgiayarns.com/2006/08/my-bags-are-full/)? Like a dream! And meeting the force of nature that is Michelle Whipplinger… also fantastic, but my highlight was…

…absolutely, positively the [surf trip to Tofino](http://blog.sweetgeorgiayarns.com/2006/08/gone-surfing/) this summer. There is no other experience in my life that has made me feel this strong and empowered… nothing like it. I don’t believe being a surfer has anything to do with your skill, your clothes, your gear, or even your attitude. I believe it has everything to do with being on the water, listening to the waves fall, feeling the relentless force of the ocean and then craving that same feeling every moment of your life. Even if it’s just spending a session bobbing in the saltwater… it’s worth it.

Spending those four days with close friends and away from the city really made me question the way we spend our time, our money, our resources. We, as in ‘Rich and I’, but also as in ‘our society’. That experience was quickly followed by [a natural dye workshop at Maiwa](http://blog.sweetgeorgiayarns.com/2006/09/reconsidering-natural/) where the owner, Charllotte, talked about dyeing in India without the need for external energy sources. It’s so hot there, the water is always warm and the sun cooks and sets the natural dyes. The concept of energy-free, synthetic-free dyeing is marinating with me now… actually lots of new thoughts are marinating with me now.

####What did you want to accomplish that you didn’t get to?
Oh, I’ve been dying to finish my [naturally-dyed, handspun and handwoven Gotland blanket](http://blog.sweetgeorgiayarns.com/tag/gotland/). That is something I would love to see completed. To wrap myself in cochineal and logwood… like a hug from nature, itself. An option now to finish it quicker is to use a millspun warp that I just dye up so that I don’t have to spin all the yardage for both warp and weft… but somehow that feels like cutting corners. So, I’m determined to persevere and create every last inch of this blanket.

####What are you planning for 2007?
Changes.

Anyway.

I have finished socks!! Here are the finished Jaywalkers in “Angel”…

####The best thing about turning 30… Contest

So, with this post I have the rare completed object… and the FIRST EVER sweetgeorgia blog contest! That’s right. That’s like two for one. Lucky you.

In the spirit of my upcoming birthday, I’m hosting a little contest and the prize will be either 2 skeins of superwash sock yarn or a braid of BFL fibre — your choice! You choose the colourway and I’ll dye it for you. All you need to do is leave me a comment starting with “The best thing about turning 30 is…”. The contest will close at midnight on Wednesday, July 19th (i.e. 11:59:59 PM) and we’ll randomly draw the winner.

Happy thoughts, people. Send happy thoughts. =)

_Here are all the details…_

Roundhouse Community Centre
181 Roundhouse Mews, Vancouver
May 23 – June 3, 2006, 9:30 am – 9:30 pm

Explore the work of Fu-chin Hu, a Taiwanese traveler, and Shyh-Charng Lo, a Taiwanese Vancouverite shown together in this exquisite joint art exhibition.

Come and see their beautiful interpretations of Vancouver scenery expressed through oil paintings. Get insight into the artists’ inspirations at the dialogue between two artists.

* Opening reception: May 23, 6:00 pm – 9:00 pm
* Artists’ talk: June 1, 7:30 pm – 9:00 pm
* Closing reception: June 2, 6:00 pm – 9:00 pm

The show is being run in conjunction with the explorINDONESIAN exhibition. The Indonesian exhibit will also have a special display of Kain Nusantara (Indonesian Traditional Textiles) which should be interesting too.

If you are interested, come on down next Tuesday and say hello!

####Four jobs you have had in your life:
1. Pharmacist at London Drugs for three years.
2. Photocopy girl at the [UBC AMS CopyRight](http://www.ams.ubc.ca/content.cfm?ID=57) photocopy shop _(I made awesome photocopies, ate chili cheese dogs and listened to [The Smiths](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Smiths) all day. Best. (university) Job. Ever.)_.
3. “Normal Job” Dodger. The summer when I turned 15, I started a business doing sewing and alterations.
4. Seamstress for a “costume” shop in New Westminster.

####Four (random) movies you could watch over and over:
1. [Fight Club](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0137523/)
2. [Infernal Affairs 1, 2 and 3](http://www.infernalaffairs.com/)
3. [Harry Potter](http://harrypotter.warnerbros.com/)
4. [Hero](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0299977/) (the one with Jet Li/Tony Leung/Maggie Cheung)

####Four places you have lived:
1. Vancouver (a house in Kitsilano when I was born)
2. Toronto (an apartment downtown when I was 4 years old)
3. Toronto (a house in North York, until I was in grade 7)
4. Vancouver (the same house in Kitsilano, except it’s ours now)

####Four TV shows you love to watch:
1. [Buffy](http://www.bbc.co.uk/cult/buffy/)
2. [The O.C.](http://www.fox.com/oc/)
3. [Angel](http://www.bbc.co.uk/cult/buffy/angel/index.shtml)
4. [Battlestar Galactica](http://www.scifi.com/battlestar/)

####Four places you have been on vacation:
1. Italy (Rome, Florence, Venice)
2. Paris
3. Japan
4. New Orleans

####Four websites you visit (almost) daily:
1. [Knitter's Review](http://www.knittersreview.com)
2. [Bloglines](http://www.bloglines.com/) this counts for 315 other feeds
3. [Epicurious.com](http://www.epicurious.com)
4. Again, Bloglines should count for more than one, eh?

####Four of your favorite foods:
1. Cheese in all shapes, sizes and colours
2. [Za Jiang Mein](http://chaxiubao.typepad.com/chaxiubao/2005/03/who_moved_my_ja.html)
3. [Blue Brie and Proscuitto Baguette sandwiches](http://blog.sweetgeorgiayarns.com/archives/2004/10/perfect_tomato.html) and Masala-spiced Carrot soup at [Finch's Caf?©](http://blog.sweetgeorgiayarns.com/archives/2004/11/knitting_over_l.html) (get thee to Pender & Homer).
4. That [Trumpet Royal Mushroom Risotto](http://www.tourismvancouver.com/visitors/dining/dineout.details.php?id=58) with sidestripe shrimp, spinach, and lemon parmesan broth that I had at C Restaurant last Sunday, by way of [Dine Out Vancouver](http://www.tourismvancouver.com/visitors/dining/dineout.php)

####Four places you would rather be right now:
1. Somewhere beachy
2. Drinking my morning coffee in Paris
3. Sleeping in my bed
4. Spinning at home, by the window

####Four Bloggers you are tagging
1. [Jasmin at Worsted Witch](http://www.worstedwitch.com/)
2. [Erin at Knitting RN](http://knittingrn.blogspot.com/)
3. [Logan at That Logan Chick](http://thatloganchick.blogspot.com/)
4. [Kim at The Woolen Rabbit](http://thewoolenrabbit.typepad.com/thewoolenrabbit/)

Last year, I set some [knitting resolutions](http://blog.sweetgeorgiayarns.com/2004/12/top-5-for-2004.html) and I managed 3/5ths of it! Finishing up the TKGA Master Knitter thing has fallen by the wayside — their Cast On magazine is a drag and just plain uninspiring. Or that could be my excuse because I just didn’t want to write a report on blocking. And knitting up the stash? Hello?

Here are my 2005 notes:

####Top Five for 2005

1. __New (to Me) Technique:__ I learned to [knit socks](http://blog.sweetgeorgiayarns.com/archives/knitting/socks/) this year. Best. Knitting. Ever. They are fun, relatively fast — almost like large pattern swatches. Almost.
2. __Favourite FO:__ Of course, it’s [Birch](http://blog.sweetgeorgiayarns.com/archives/2005/09/birch.html). I may just make another one.
3. __Favourite KAL:__ My favourite KAL is actually one that I haven’t joined. It’s the [Crossed in Translation KAL](http://www.januaryone.com/archives/2005/11/crossed_in_tran_1.php) that Cara is hosting — what a wonderful use for a KAL — actually helping each other with the translation of a gorgeous Japanese pattern. Oh dear. I just noticed that it doesn’t start until January 1st. I may just have to clear my schedule for this…
4. __Favourite Shop:__ Unabashedly [my own](http://sweetgeorgia.etsy.com/), of course! Last year at this time, a shop of my own hadn’t even crossed my mind. Life is crazy I tell you. But if I were to pick anything else, I’d say [Lettuce Knit](http://www.lettuceknit.com/). I can’t get this little shop out of my mind. It is the most adorable half-lot in Kensington Market in Toronto. It’s painted bright green and the whole shop is only a little bigger than my bathroom. I didn’t actually buy anything when I was there last Fall, but this year my brother visited the shop and brought me back a [bag full of Fleece Artist roving](http://blog.sweetgeorgiayarns.com/archives/2005/09/tis_freaking_do.html). And now, they carry spinning wheels and other accoutrements. Plus, [Cosmic Pluto](http://www.cosmicpluto.com/blog/?p=429) is even dyeing silk hankies for sale in store.
5. __Favourite Tool:__ [Schacht Dizzy Yarn Gauge](http://www.schachtspindle.com/Products/Spinning/spinning_accessories.htm). It’s a diz. It’s a wraps-per-inch tool. It matches my wheel. I love it.

####Knitting & Spinning Resolutions for 2006

1. __Starmore.__ I’m looking forward to finishing my first Alice Starmore design, [St. Brigid](http://blog.sweetgeorgiayarns.com/archives/knitting/knit_st_brigid/), next year. Beautiful purple yarn, beautiful cables. Should be enough to keep me interested.
2. __Big time handspun project.__ I bought 8 oz. of [Ashland Bay Merino](http://blog.sweetgeorgiayarns.com/archives/2005/05/roving_roving_r.html) in May that I have been spinning finely ever since. I just plied up the last of it last night, so I’m looking forward to knitting this up into one of my first _feature-length_ projects. This may become a shawl…
3. __Spinning low-twist singles.__ The more I spin, the finer I get. I want to develop a full range of ability to spin whatever I want, whenever I want… starting with worsted-weight low-twist singles.
4. __More Steeking!__ Yeah, I loved that [Baby Norgi](http://blog.sweetgeorgiayarns.com/archives/knitting/knit_baby_norgi/) project. It gave me confidence to cut my knitting however I liked. _Empowered, am I._ I have a beautiful [Meg Swansen Fair Isle Cardigan](http://blog.sweetgeorgiayarns.com/archives/knitting/knit_fair_isle_cardigan/) on the needles right now — and it’s waiting for me to switch to my new [Holz & Stein Ebony circs](http://www.dasstrickforum.de/)… Can’t wait to have some time to spend with this lovely sweater.
5. __Design by me, for me.__ Ok, again with the knitting up the stash. I’ve bought several packs of Filatura di Crosa Zara that stress me out. They literally stress me out. I’ve spent a year looking for a nice, interesting DK-weight pattern that I can knit using these yarns and just haven’t found anything I like. So this will be a meditative, relaxing activity, no?